“Big mug or small mug?” asked Alban, emerging from the kitchen. He held two steaming cups of tea, one for me and another for his wife, Esther. “Small, please”, I replied. I rarely finish a full cup.
We sat in their living room in Waterloo, Esther to my left, and Alban, cross-legged, across from her. To my right, the window was open, welcoming in a gentle breeze and the sound of children playing across the street. The net curtains to and froed as we spoke, swaying like the ebb and flow of conversation. This didn’t feel like central London.
Alban and Esther moved here from Durham last August, only a few weeks after getting married, but quickly found their feet in a new city and church. They joined Luke and Issy’s life group, forming friendships over dinner, Bible study, and prayer. But now the couple awaits another change. They prepare to start their own life group this autumn and open up their lounge—and lives—to many more.
“We went to one of the Welcome events* and there were a lot of people,” said Esther as I asked them about their initial experience at Grace.
“Afterwards, we were really keen to go to a life group, so
I was like, 'Andrea, Andrea, please put us in a life group.’ She was like, ‘We’re trying!’. It worked out eventually, and we started going to Issy and Luke's group from last October.
“What’s been particularly nice about the group is the number of new Christians - I guess because Luke and Issy help at the Salt Course. It was lovely being part of their initial Christian journey and first discipleship group.”
“And it wasn't a Bible club where you just chat about things you all know”, Alban added. “It felt more like everyone was learning and being encouraged. It was more about life than pure study. Sometimes…I don't know… Sometimes groups like these can be more about the study than the people.
“Yeah”, Esther said. “And it's special having Issy and Luke as our leaders because we've just got married, and they’re a bit further along. They've been married a year or two, and are a little bit older than us. It's nice to look up to them.”
“Do you have a favourite life group memory?” I asked.
“One sweet thing we did was go to our friend’s ballet show”, Esther replied. “She joined our life group aged only 17, having moved from Edinburgh. That was really fun because it felt like family, the kind of thing your aunts and uncles would come to. We were in the front row, like, ‘There she is! There she is!’
I wondered how Alban and Esther would recreate this sense of community in their own group. “What’s your vision for the new life group?” I asked.
“Life group is just a structure for good Christian community”, Alban said. “And, ideally, that structure will feel natural and almost invisible. I’d hope everyone would be like, ‘Well, of course we hang out, have dinner together, open the Bible and pray for each other.’ Like any Christian family would.”
“I don't see it like a theology club”, Esther added. “Or that we’re leaders in a very formal sense—
“We see it exactly as the life group handbook says,” Alban interjected, his dry humour filling the room with laughter. “Whatever Jeremy said about a month ago at the training day, it’s that.”
He paused, continuing more seriously. “We also want to be part of each other's lives throughout the week, whether it’s dropping a text, catching up, or going to someone's uni show.”
I couldn’t help but feel that this couple has centred themselves wholeheartedly around church community - sitting in their lounge just 10 minutes from the London Nautical School. I wanted to know how we could support them. “Last question”, I said. “How can we pray for you?”
After a pause, Esther began. “I felt a bit nervous about starting a life group. There’s the worry, ‘Am I gonna be able to serve people in the way they deserve?’ I'm in a better place now, but still feel a bit imposter syndrome-ish.” She laughed nervously. “Pray that we’d trust God.”
“The thing we want most for the group”, Alban added, “is for strong friendships to form.”
“Yeah”, Esther chimed, suddenly full of self-assured excitement. “Like a real community where people really do share their lives. Where we really love each other.”
